house of the dragon season 2 premiere
(Photo Credit: HBO)

House of the Dragon Season 2 Premiere Thoughts and Theories

Child murder, death, despicable men doing despicable things, sex, booze, depressing violins, and dragons — just another typical day in the Game of Thrones prequel. Let’s dive into the new season with our House of the Dragon Season 2 premiere thoughts and theories. After a lengthy hiatus, the epic prequel to George R.R. Martin’s once-popular TV series returns for more war-mongering to determine who will sit upon the always coveted Iron Throne: the Greens, led by Alicent (Olivia Cooke) and her son Aegon (Tom Glynn-Carney), or the Blacks, led by Rhaenyra Targaryen (Emma D’Arcy) and her uncle turned husband Daemon (Matt Smith).

The inaugural season followed King Viserys I (Paddy Considine) during his tumultuous rule as he contended with his family’s overdramatic whims. I won’t do a full-on recap of Season 1 here; suffice it to say that too many people f—ing around and found out, literally and figuratively, resulting in a full-scale war. The Blacks contend that Rhaenyra and her kin are the true heirs to the throne, even though her kids are “bastards” (it’s complicated), while the Greens believe Alicent’s offspring, themselves children of the King, are meant to rule. Eventually, everyone fights, the King dies, more people fight, and Alicent’s crazy son Aemond (Ewan Mitchell) accidentally kills one of Rhaenyra’s sons during a dragon fight.

Where will Season 2 take us? Probably not that far, as the top-rated series just got renewed for a third season, meaning the showrunners can stretch this sucker out as long as they want. Thankfully, since we’re not waiting for Martin to finish this saga, we know the years spent pining over these characters won’t be in vain.

Okay, onto our House of the Dragon Season 2 premiere 1 thoughts and theories. Let’s do this.

What happened in the House of the Dragon Season 2 premiere

“A Son for a Son” picks up a few days after Luke turned into dragon lunch meat for the mighty Vhagar. After a gorgeous new opening that trades the iconic Game of Thrones model design for a tapestry, we catch up with Jace (Harry Collett) at Winterfell and later at the almighty Wall. Remember, he was part of a two-person team (the other being Luke) sent by his mother, Rhaenyra, to determine the loyalty of the great houses, including the Starks. Somehow, he bumps into the only person at the Wall who sounds exactly like Jon Snow. Jace enjoys a bumpy ride to the top of the Wall and learns that a) the Starks will heed their oath to Rhaenyra and b) the giant structure exists to keep out the Dead. Eh, somehow, the White Walker army isn’t quite as foreboding these days.

Jace pleads for an army before being whisked away by lousy news from Dragonstone.

Speaking of which, back at the rocky fortress, Princess Rhaenys Targaryen (Eve Best), i.e., the Queen That Never Was, squares off with an antsy Daemon. He wants to take the Greens head-on, but Rhaenyra is off sulking over the death of her son. Rhaeny implores him to give her more time, noting that when her daughter died, she wept for weeks.

Daemon says what we are all thinking. “If you’d have acted when you had the chance, Aegon’s line would be extinguished. And Luke would be alive.” He’s referring to the bit last season where Rhaenys used her Dragon to crash Aegon’s coronation, killing hundreds of innocent spectators in the process. The always-smirking princess had Alicent’s fam dead to rights but flew away without murdering any of them. Meanwhile, the citizens of King’s Landing are brushed aside like the inconsequential people we are … I mean, they are. I meant to say they.

Unfazed by Daemon’s empty threats, the always smirking Rhaenys turns and struts away, noting that Daemon is in no position to give orders. At some point, this dude will have to do something interesting to remain relevant. Nobody appears to give him much notice, and he’s now spent the last three episodes wandering around in his suit of armor, relentlessly begging for war. He’s a complex guy and ultimately vile, but probably the show’s most interesting character. Don’t muck this up, Dragon!

Meanwhile, Rhaenyra wanders around a beach to pad the episode’s runtime.

Then, we get a brief scene with Corlys (Steve Toussaint) in which he thanks a man named Alyn for saving his life. He also takes a moment to mourn Luke, verifying how tragic the young Prince’s death was for everyone. It would have been nice to see the lad converse with the main characters last season so that these small moments rang true.

At King’s Landing, we see Aegon converse with Queen Helaena (Phia Saban) about rats (more on that later) before cutting to Alicent, er, enjoying the company of Ser Criston (Fabien Frankel). “Never again,” she says after their session ends. Right.

As a side, Criston has slept with two of the most powerful women in Westeros. Well done, most honorable knight. Hopefully, Alicent doesn’t break up with him anytime soon. He doesn’t handle rejection very well.

We zip over to witness Aegon’s first council session and instantly miss Viserys. The new King gets a kick from watching his son, Jaehaerys, torment Sir Tyland Lannister. We get a kick watching the Queen berate Tyland for disrupting the meeting. Anyone who has ever worked in customer service instantly understands Tyland’s pain.

Aemond suddenly strolls in at the behest of his brother. Talk now turns to war. Alicent appears willing to compromise with Rhaenyra, while Aegon is keen to send in the dragons. Everyone, including Otto Hightower (Rhys Ifans), recommends patience. I suspect the showrunners are speaking directly to the audience. Dig in, kids, House of the Dragon isn’t afraid to meander.

house of the dragon season 2 premiere
(Photo Credit: HBO)

On that note, we get another scene of Rhaenyra crying over Luke after discovering his remains on a beach.

Then, we’re back at King’s Landing, where Aegon confronts his loyal subjects for the first time. He’s new at this gig and tries to cut through the politics to help a local farmer. Of course, Otto points out that if he aids this farmer, he’ll have to do the same for all the farmers. Politics in a nutshell. We get so caught up with the simpering weasels atop the Iron Throne that we forget how every decision they make deeply affects the normies of King’s Landing. Imagine if Alicent and Rhaenyra could put aside their petty differences and join forces for the good of the Realm.

Larys Strong (Matthew Needham) notes Aegon’s frustration and does what he does best: whisper sweet deceptions in the King’s ear. In this instance, he takes the first step in turning Aegon against Otto. I think.

What does Larys want? Power? Money? Respect? Alicent’s feet? I can’t figure that one out. Also, I’m not all that interested. Larys operates from the shadows but feels like the Wal-Mart version of Little Finger. He needs to become more than another one-dimensional wicked Game of Thrones villain longing for bloodshed. Lord knows we have plenty of those already on this show.

Speaking of worthless characters, Daemon’s men capture the White Worm (Sonoya Mizuno) and bring her before the Prince. She reveals how she was selling secrets to Otto, or something, and Daemon uses her desperation to craft a plan designed to give his Queen what she truly wants: Aemond. The White Worm has spies, or something, that know all about the tunnels beneath the Red Keep. Okay, let’s go.

In between the madness, Rhaenarys endures another funeral. At King’s Landing, Alicent likewise mourns the dead, lighting a candle for each of them. This scene also reveals the depth of the conflict between our two women. Simply put, it’s too late to turn back now.

Later, Daemon, dressed like a Jedi, confronts two men at King’s Landing and asks about the tunnels beneath the Red Keep. “Great big rat nest, it is,” one of the men says. “I know them better than the shape of my own cock.” This remark leaves everyone, including Daemon, flummoxed for a few beats. Daemon eventually continues and hands over a bag of gold. “Bring me the head of Aemond Targaryen.”

“What if we can’t find him?” the man asks, and Daemon flashes him a spooky look.

Aemond and Criston pad the runtime with an exposition dump. However, Aemond drops a juicy nugget when speaking about Alicent: “She holds love for our enemy. That makes her a fool.” Yikes. Aemond continues to sniff his own farts and, like Daemon, longs for battle the way a caffeine addict craves their morning coffee — desperately, and with a fervor that borders on the absurd.

Otto arrives, breaks up the party, and tells Aemond to be patient and wait for his brother Aegon to screw up. Or something along those lines. Will Aemond reach the Iron Throne?

We get to the final third of the episode, a lengthy sequence that follows Daemon’s bumbling assassins through the sewers, past the throne room where Aegon drunkenly talks about his “dragon cock,” and eventually into Aemond’s quarters. Short Assassin kicks his dog; the Big Assassin threatens Short Assassin, and the pair wind up in Aegon’s room, where Emma Stone from Poor Things lingers and then mysteriously vanishes. The music picks up, and Big Assassin finds Short Assassin holding Helaena at knifepoint in front of her infant children. Clearly, they’ve seen James Cameron’s Avatar: The Way of Water. “A son for a son,” they explain. “Which one is the boy,” Short Assassin asks Big Assassin. “Look for a cock!” This show’s obsession with the word “cock” is hilarious. Helaena recognizes her Sophie’s Choice predicament and decides to let the boy die. The two brutes literally stab the poor child to death and then cut off his head. Luckily, the show spares us of the gruesome details, but it’s still a helluva scene.

Welcome back, House of the Dragon.

Helaena takes her daughter and runs. She tricked the assassins, you see? I don’t know how, but she tricked them into murdering the heir to the throne—or one of them, anyway. The poor Queen bursts into Alicent’s room and finds her, um, once again enjoying Criston Cole’s company. “Never again,” she says before seeing Helaena. “What’s happened,” Alicent snaps.

“They killed the boy.”

The camera zooms into Alicent’s horrified expression as Criston curses at the Queen’s unbelievably bad timing. With that, the House of the Dragon Season 2 premiere comes to an incredibly bleak close, which is the perfect way to start a long work week.

House of the Dragon Season 2 Episode 1 thoughts

I hate premiere episodes. They spend too much time recapping the previous season, introducing new characters, and laying the groundwork for future episodes. After a two-year wait, I wanted to dive right into Dragon’s central conflict, not spend an hour tip-toeing around it.

Instead, the House of the Dragon Season 2 premiere spent a good deal of time spinning its wheels by reminding us of the discord between the Blacks and Greens. The stuff with Aegon was kind of fun, but everything else just reaffirmed what we already knew: Alicent is pissed, Rhaenyra is pissed, Criston Cole is a douche, Larys is vile, Daemon lusts for conflict, and this world consists of mostly despicable, cock-obsessed human beings, and dragons. I imagine the next few episodes will kick up the tension, but somebody needs to fire the first shot to get this party started.

Alicent and Rhaenyra have plenty of reasons to go to war. Stop messing around and get to it, ladies! We’ll see you next week on Max.

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